Horse Jokes 2
Thought we write a few horse jokes to make your day and put a smile on your face, as there is so much negative news lately.
Feel free to share the post with family and friends and tell us what joke was hilarious for you.
Hope you enjoy the jokes.
Number 1 – Amish Guy
Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
A: A mechanic
Number 2 – Bar
A horse limps into a bar one day. He’s got a bandage around his head and looks really ill.
He orders a glass of the most expensive champagne, a vintage brandy and two pints of Guinness.
When the bartender serves them to him, he quickly downs them all.
Then he says, “You know, I shouldn’t really be drinking this with what I’ve got…”
The bartender asks, “Why, what have you got?”
The horse replies, “About 2 dollars and a carrot.”
Number 3 – Race
An inflatable jockey was riding an inflatable horse for an inflatable trainer and an inflatable owner. It was his first time over the jumps.
After the last fence he was leading easily but he pulled up way too early allowing two other horses to pass him.
After the race the jockey was so mad with what he’d done, that he stuck a pin in the horse, then he stuck a pin in the trainer and then the owner.
Because of this he was called in front of the Stewards.
When he was facing them, he stuck a pin in himself.
The Stewards said to him, “You’re a disgrace. Not only did you let the horse, the trainer and the owner down, you have let yourself down too.”
Number 4 – Sport
Q: What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
A: Stable Tennis.
Number 5 – Offer
A guy was driving past a farm one day when he noticed a beautiful horse stood in one of the fields.
Hoping to buy the horse, the guy stopped and offered the farmer $500 for it.
The farmer said, “Sorry, he’s not for sale. He doesn’t look too good.”
The guy said, “He looks just fine. Tell you what, I’ll give you $1,000 for him.”
The farmer again said, “Sorry, he’s not for sale. He doesn’t look too good.”
The guy now really wanted the horse and so increased his offer to $1,500.
The farmer said, “Well, he doesn’t look so good but if you want him that much he’s yours.”
So the guy bought the horse and took him home.
The next day he returned to the farm, hopping mad. He shouted at the farmer, “Hey, you cheated me! You sold me a blind horse!”
The farmer calmly said, “I told you he didn’t look too good, didn’t I?”
Number 6 – Desperado
A Desperado rides into town and downs a few drinks at the saloon. When he steps outside again, he finds his horse has been stolen. The Desperado swears, steps back into the bar, and fires a round into the piano. The room goes dead silent. “I’m gonna have one more beer,” the Desperado bellows to the terrified crowd, “and if my horse ain’t back where I left him when I’m done, I’ll do here what I had to do in Houston.”
The locals murmur uneasily as the Desperado sips his drink. Lucky for them all, when he steps outside again his horse has been returned. As the Desperado saddles up, a local can’t help but ask, “Sir, what exactly was it you had to do in Houston?”
The Desperado narrows his eyes and hisses at the man, “I had to walk home.”
Number 7 – Other Kind Of Horse
Q: What’s black and white and eats like a horse?
A: A Zebra.
Number 8 – Talking Horse
A guy is walking through the country when he spots a sign that reads, “Talking Horse for Sale.” Intrigued, he walks up to the stable to check it out.
“So what have you done with your life?” he asks the horse.
“I’ve led a full life,” the horse answers miraculously. “I was born in The Andes where I herded for an entire village. Years later, I joined the mounted police force in New York and helped keep the city clean. And now, I spend my days giving free rides to underprivileged kids here in the country.”
The guy is flabbergasted. He asks the horse’s owner, “Why on earth would you want to get rid of such an incredible animal?”
The owner says, “Because he’s a liar! He never did any of that!”
Number 9 – Friday
Q: How did the cowboy ride into town on Friday, stay for three days, and ride out on Friday?
A: His horse’s name was Friday!
Number 10 – Street
Q: What street do horses live on?
A: Mane St.
Number 11 – Bedtime
Q: What did the momma say to the foal?
A: Its pasture your bedtime
Number 12 – Sick Foal
Q: How do you know when a foal is sick?
A: ITS A LITTLE HOARSE.
Number 13 – Favorite State
Q: What is a horses favorite state?
A: Neighbraska.
Number 14 – Drunk Horse
Q: How do you get a horse drunk?
A: Drink him under the stable.
Number 15 – Favorite Song
Q: What is a horses favorite song?
A: Watch Me (Whip / Neigh Neigh)
Overweight guy climbing onto a horse
So while trying to find some funny video's that was shared this week, I found this video labeled Horse's Weight Capacity Exceeded - Very Funny video.
Horse Meat might be on your plate soon in the USA
Recently, the House Appropriations Committee took a step towards permitting horse slaughter in the UNITED STATES after beating a ban on horse meat inspections by the Agriculture Division. On Tuesday, wild horse supporters hope that the...
Watch: Dog and Foal playing until mum decided enough is enough
This 3 weeks old Miniature Horse Foal called 'Dynamo' was playing with the 2-year-old German Shepherd called 'Rusty' until the foals mother 'Gracy' decided that enough is enough. Watch the video to see what happened.
Watch : Extremely dangerous horse falls
As being a horse rider I sometimes encounter people telling me that horse riding is not a sport or something like wow your not doing anything the horse is doing everything and you're just sitting there.
The Naming Game
Have you ever wondered how horses get their names?
New research shows that being an Extreme ‘Horse Lover’ is caused by a Virus
A virus may be behind some of the outrageous actions which are frequently seen in the horse addicted, based on modern research.
a Dancing Horse in a commercial goes Viral
A fan of Horses? music? and maybe like to dance? If you answer yes to any of these questions then you are about to fall head over heals in-love!
An Appaloosa called Moonshine saved a Michigan minister
Moonshine, now called the Hero Horse, aided in saving an adult male trapped below a tractor. Moonshine is a polite, 15-year-old Appaloosa gelding who lives in St. Clair County in Michigan. But on Tuesday, July 11, his behavior was...
Funny horses laugh vw commercial
This is the one commercial as a Horse Lovers that you're going to watch over and over and over.
Overweight guy climbing onto a horse
So while trying to find some funny video's that was shared this week, I found this video labeled Horse's Weight Capacity Exceeded - Very Funny video.
Watch: Horse play’s the flute with his nose
a Horse in Sweden was recorded playing the flute, with some assistance from a man they play "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star"
An Appaloosa called Moonshine saved a Michigan minister
Moonshine, now called the Hero Horse, aided in saving an adult male trapped below a tractor. Moonshine is a polite, 15-year-old Appaloosa gelding who lives in St. Clair County in Michigan. But on Tuesday, July 11, his behavior was...
Horse insists on a back rub, don’t you dare stop
So you ride me all day and you tell me what to do, now it is my turn, rub my back please and don't you dare stop.
An Appaloosa called Moonshine saved a Michigan minister
Moonshine, now called the Hero Horse, aided in saving an adult male trapped below a tractor. Moonshine is a polite, 15-year-old Appaloosa gelding who lives in St. Clair County in Michigan. But on Tuesday, July 11, his behavior was...
Top 10 War Horses from History
From day one since the human beings were discovered on this planet there has been their need of having a good partner around rising. This partner doesn’t always have to be another human of another gender and thanks to evolution it gave us horses, a bunch of amazing animals that stand by our side whenever we need them and ones that are perhaps the richer in such case from history.
The Naming Game
Have you ever wondered how horses get their names?
Top 10 War Horses from History
From day one since the human beings were discovered on this planet there has been their need of having a good partner around rising. This partner doesn’t always have to be another human of another gender and thanks to evolution it gave us horses, a bunch of amazing animals that stand by our side whenever we need them and ones that are perhaps the richer in such case from history.
Watch : Some breathtaking Horse Tattoos for Horse Lovers
Below you will find a video that showcases some awesome horse tattoos that real horse lovers have on their bodies. We have also included some images that you might like to see.
Top 10 Best Horse Movies of All Time
There’s a reason why there aren’t just human beings on this planet. The reason can be simply the way genetics went or the evolution sorted things or it can be an answer to why human beings need companions other than the humans themselves and who else can really fill in the requirement other than an animal that is a pet and what possibly can get better than having a horse as a companion.
All About Equestrian Jewelry
Horse lovers and riding enthusiasts show their love for horses in many ways. Some like to wear equestrian outfits. Others use equestrian home decor in their houses. Still others like to use equestrian jewelry.
The Journey of Doc Bar
Here is exactly how one single horse transformed an entire breed forever: The Journey of Doc Bar. If you're fascinated in the origin of Quarter Horses, then you definitely ought to understand the journey of Doc Bar, the most historical Quarter Horse in US History. Doc...